I feel dazed as contact with reality is partially lost.
Loss of vacations, In office work, birthday celebrations, graduations – even your touch.
Life is lived in the details, with no mercy in sight — This is our great loss.
Anxiety ridden thoughts I’m afraid of: being sick, dying alone, the end never comes, no sense of normalcy.
During the bombings, in the bunker I socialized we all shared the same fate.
Uncertainty leaves us no courage and broken down.
Life outside is a gamble. I don’t want to be that body.
This poem was inspired by two opinion videos I watched on The New York Times where I used majority of the lines spoken to form this Cento.
Messages From Quarantine by Niccolo Natali and Nikola Lorenzin really hit home because we are all at a big loss. We are all broken and living with a high level of uncertainty.
We’re All Grieving. This is How We Get Through It. By Nayeema Raza spoke to me because we all are experiencing a sense of anxiety. Our lives were cancelled/disrupted by this pandemic with no clear vision that this will ever end. This should not stop us in our tracks. We still need to celebrate with each other.
The commute to the office was easy. No traffic just a sleepy cat that needed to be relocated off of me. The coffee was excellent and the day started right on the dot. Today’s going to be a great day, or so I thought.
I enjoy Ted talks that are short about 15min or really any movie about that length. I’ve attend webinars in the past, but today was just dreadful. Back-to-back webinars, for 4 hours, all centered around the same topic: covid-19.
By the time I left my office desk my brain was fried. Each webinar offered a few tips here and there but generally had the same messaging: treat this like a natural disaster oh and we are all in uncharted waters (well that makes me feel better).
To revive my fried brain, I attempted to do yoga. I never understood the purpose of yoga. I thought it was for the weak who didn’t want to lift iron. Today I found out I was wrong. Yoga is challenging and I probably should do more of it now that I’m on house arrest.
After I did just 30 mins of yoga, I felt relieved from the day at work. Tomorrow will be a new day, a new challenge. But… I’d like to know what you’re doing during these uncertain times to keep your sanity.
P.S. — typing this from my phone is a but of a challenge vs. my computer, lesson learned.
Today was the day that depression won,
because the world was too heavy.
Each day another battle was waiting,
body too heavy to move out of bed.
The gloomy cloud darkens above
as it rains harder through the day.
This world beat her down too far
leaving her weak and famished.
Today was the day that depression won
and she gained her wings leaving behind
children, family, and friends weeping.
Recently a dear family friend fought a hard battle with depression and a variety of other things. The family friend gave her life because she wasn’t able to control life anymore. If you or anyone you know that is suffering with depression or suicidal thoughts reach out to the suicide hotlines or movements. To Write Love On Her Arms is a great movement. Take care all.